The Lunatic
by Yukito-sama
Summary: Spoof on Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Spoken words are (c) to the guys who made it, rest BELONGS TO ME MWAHAHAHA


They had been travling for hours, searching for something worthy enough for them to fight. The group was small; consisting of three knights, their leader a crusader, and two novices. The Crusader, Art, lead the way through the deep forest of Prontera, weaving in and out of the thick spots. Every so often there was a complaint from someone but they would silence when Art would through them a nasty look.  
  
A loud explosion suddenly rang out, causing the leaves to shake. The two novices cowered beside the knights, gripping their knives with fear. The knights smirked and giggled only to fall silence as another explosion cut through the air. All eyes fell to Art; he stood alret and his eyes scanning the area. He motioned for the group to follow and he darted through the trees. After a moment of fear the remaining group hurried after him.  
  
"Art, where are we going?" a novice cried out.  
  
"Eh?" Art said, coming to a slow halt. They were in a clearing and a large cloud of smoke was drifting through the air. Art gast his gaze towards a stump a few yards away. A young man sat on the stump, a wizard by the looks of it, casting spell after spell into the air. He yawned and caused fire to dance across his finger tips. Art trotted towards him, his small group in tow. "You sir! What manner of man are you that can summon up fire without flint or tinder?"  
  
The wizard looked at him and let out another yawn as he ran a hand through his sandy hair. "I. . . . am an enchanter."  
  
"By what name are you known?" Art asked, his hand slipping towards the hilt of his sword.  
  
"There are some who call me Tim." the boy said with a snicker.  
  
Art held out his hand and smiled slightly. "Greetings, Tim the Enchanter."  
  
'Tim' took Art's hand happily and shook it. "Greetings, Art the Knight."  
  
"Wha?" Art took a hasty step back. "You know my name?"  
  
'Tim' nodded. "I heard him say it." He pointed towards one of the crusaders, who nervously looked about. "Anywho, I know that you're searching for a worthy fight. Am I right?"  
  
"That is our quest. You know much that is hidden, O Tim." Art replied with worrisome smile. 'Tim' stood angrily, causing the small group to take a step back. "Yes, we're--we're looking for a worthy opponent. Our quest is to find an advisary." The rest of Art's team began to chip in nervously, shouting things like "Yes we are" or "We have been for sometime." With a wave of his hand 'Tim' shot a fire ball into the air, silencing them all.  
  
"Um, okay," Art said. "I don't want to waste any more of your time, but, uh, I don't suppose you could, um, tell us where we might find a, um,--find a, uh. . . ."  
  
'Tim' cocked an eyebrow. "A worthy fight?"  
  
"YES!" everyone shouted.  
  
"Okay! To the north lies a cave, the cave of Chaerbannog, wherein, carved in mystic runes upon the living rock, the last words of Torrc Midnight of Morroc make plain the resting place." 'Tim' explained.  
  
"Cool!" the crusaders yelled. "Lets go!"  
  
'Tim' rolled his eyes. "HANG ON. There is a warning. The entrance to this cave is guarded by a creature so foul, so cruel that no man yet has fought with it and lived! Bones of full fifty men lie strewn about its lair. So, brave knights, if you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further, for death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth."  
  
By the time 'Tim' had finished his warning, Art and his friends were already gone. "SONOFACRAPDAMNIT. Gotta catch up with 'em."  
  
**********  
  
When 'Tim' finally caught up with the hasty group they were nearly at the mouth of the cave. "Behold! The cave of Caerbannog!"  
  
"Right-o!" Art said with a smile. "Okay, keep me covered."  
  
The crusaders looked at each other. "With what?"  
  
"Wha?" Art said, nearly falling. "Just keep me covered, you idiots."  
  
"Too late!" 'Tim' cried. He pointed towards the cave's entrance. "There he is."  
  
The group began to move about, looking towards the gave to see this terrible monster. "Where?" "What?" "Lemme see." "Is it behind the Lunatic?"  
  
'Tim' hung his head low with a sigh. "It is the Lunatic. How dense are you guys?"  
  
"That's just a silly Lunatic!" Art barked.  
  
"That's no ordinary Lunatic. That's the most foul, cruel, and bad- tempered rodent you ever set your eyes on." 'Tim' replied.  
  
One of the crusaders grabbed 'Tim' by his collar. "You moron! I soiled my armour, I was so scared."  
  
"Look," 'Tim' said. "that Lunatic's got a vicious streak a mile wide! It's a killer."  
  
The group broke wout into laughter. They quickly began to poke fun at the wizard and he was beginnign to grow angry. Slowly they pushed one of the crusaders towards the Lunatic, egging him on.  
  
"Go on! Chop his head off!"  
  
The crusader laughed happily and drew his weapon. "Alright! One Lunatic stew comin' up."  
  
"Look!" 'Tim' yelled.  
  
As the young crusader grew closer to the Lunatic, the white creature barred it's teeth and quickly lunged for the man's throat. The group let out a scream and watched in horrified silence as their frined got maimed.  
  
'Tim' smirked and looked at Art. "You were saying?"  
  
The group looked at each other, than at 'Tim,' and then at the Luntatic that was gnawing on the man's leg.  
  
"Um, who wants to get ice cream?" Art asked. The group quickly raised their hands. "Okay! That way, to Prontera!"  
  
END 


End file.
